Author(s): Tony Silva

Gay and Bi Male Relationships

An intimate look at gay and bisexual daddies and their younger partners

Over the past several years the term "daddy" has increased in popularity. Although the term has existed for centuries, its meaning has changed over time, and today can refer to desirable older men. In the Western world, same-sex male couples are far more likely to have large age gaps than other types of partnerships, and Daddies of a Different Kind analyzes the stories of gay and bisexual daddies and asks why younger men are interested in older men for sex and relationships.

Based on interviews with self-described daddies and young adult men in relationships with older men, Tony Silva uncovers why it is more common for gay and bisexual men to have large age gaps in relationships than heterosexuals or LGBTQ women. These stories reveal that queer relationships with large age gaps are not consistent with a sugar daddy/gold digger stereotype. Instead, daddies mentor younger adult men and transmit knowledge intergenerationally, including how to navigate homophobia, access gay communities, and have fulfilling sex. Silva shows that demographic research understates the commonality of age-gap pairings among gay and bisexual men, and illustrates how daddies shape gay and bisexual communities both culturally and sexually. A fascinating read, Daddies of a Different Kind breaks many commonly held stereotypes about gay and bisexual life.

December 2023