Augusten’s parents separated when he was 12 and he lived for a while with his unstable mother after his father refused to have anything more to do with him. His mother continued to be treated by the Svengali-like therapist Dr Finch and over time Augusten spent more and more time with the merged Finch family. Finch believed that as a teenager Augusten was responsible for his own actions and could do what he liked. This leads to the retelling of some funny episodes in a way similar to David Sedaris. There may be less wit, but the bizarreness has been cranked up a few notches.

Augusten decides that he does not want to go to school and Finch suggests that the only way this can be done is if he attempts suicide. They set up a situation where the therapist walks in on Augusten after he has taken a few pills and a bottle of whisky and so after a period in hospital he is given into the care of Finch with his school days behind him.

At one stage Finch believes that God is speaking to him through his shit and his daughter, Hope, is made to collect his stools, put them in the sun to dry before he interprets them. Augusten asks, “Would I get into beauty school?’ There were many small, broken stools. ‘Chop, chop, chop, like scissors. I’d say that’s a yes,’ the doctor said with a smile.”
Would the Internal Revenue Service seize the house? “Diarrhoea means they’ll mess the records up. The house is ours!”
What about Hope; would she ever get married? “See all that corn? Hope’s going to marry a farmer.The fortune telling only ends when the good doctor becomes constipated.

But with this complete freedom and lack of adult control Augusten begins to crave some guidance. With his father gone, his mother going from one ‘incident’ to the next and his guardian, Dr. Finch, on his own planet, Augusten drifts through his early teen years. Freedom was what we had…So why did we feel so trapped? Why did I feel like I had no options in my life when it seemed that options were the only thing I did have?

Running With Scissors is an hilarious read. At moments I gaped with disbelief at the selfishness of the adults in Augusten’s life. But I finished the book hoping for more. How did he survive the years between where the book ends and the actual writing of it? What has he learned since that has coloured how he now receives his childhood? There is little self-analysis in the book by Burroughs. The writing style may be simple but the voice is that of an adult and we are not allowed into the writer’s teenaged head. This is ultimately the failure of the book as this reader craved to know more about the boy behind the anecdotes.